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3 Ways to Make Your Home Trauma-Informed

3 Ways to Make Your Home Trauma-Informed

We all want our home to be warm and welcoming. However, for friends and family who have experienced trauma, environmental factors can either trigger intense emotional pain or be instrumental in their healing journey. Being intentional about the physical and emotional manner of your home makes a significant impact on helping guests feel comfortable enough to be vulnerable as they work through their trauma. Whether you are a foster parent wanting to serve the youth in your care better or an individual who just wants a more therapeutic living environment, here are three ways to make your home more trauma-informed.

1. Rethink your physical space.

You only have so much control over your living space — the number of windows, room layout, etc. But there are simple ways everyone can help create deeper connections and comfort. Consider the type of interactions your shared spaces are set up to facilitate. Living and dining rooms are incredible opportunities for connection, but they can also be places to “tune out.”

If the TV is the focal point of the living room, rearrange furniture so it is out of the way, making it an area more conducive for meaningful conversations to take place.

Likewise, children, teens and adults who struggle to make connections because of their trauma histories need a little extra help in learning how to feel safe in relationships. Removing technology is a simple way to remove barriers to connection. Laptops, tablets and phones are best left out of the dining area at mealtimes.

For children who have experienced trauma, giving them some control over their bedroom space will go far. What is their favorite color? Find a way to introduce it to their room. Do they have a special toy or comfort item? Make sure it has a place of honor.

Incorporating your child's favorite colors and things into their room may sound insignificant but it's not. It is vital for children to learn that their voice matters and that they can make decisions that have positive outcomes.

2. Normalize talking about feelings.

Most youth who have experienced trauma have learned to bottle up their feelings as a coping mechanism to feel safe. Because of this, they may need some coaching and practice to see and learn that it is okay to express their feelings through conversation.

Make feelings a regular part of your discussions by adding the simple question “How did that make you feel?” to the normal “What happened today?”. When a child shares a happy emotion, celebrate with them. When a child shares a painful emotion, validate them.

Children learn by example, so talking about your own emotions and how you acted in response will demonstrate healthy ways to deal with their strong feelings without resorting to problematic behavior. Know that it is usually a slow process for someone with a trauma history to open up, so go out of your way to show that you are trustworthy and it is safe to talk about big feelings in your home.

3. Model self-care.

If the adults in a child’s life don’t take care of themselves, the child is likely to stumble into that behavior as well. Finding practices that help you to manage stress and stay healthy — exercise, meditation, reading, prayer, etc.— is essential to creating a therapeutic home environment. If you aren’t taking care of yourself, you won’t be able to take care of anyone else for very long. 

Let the children in your home see you practice self-care and help them to find techniques that work for them. Not only will it show them that you consider yourself worth caring for, they will learn that they are worth caring for as well.

Learn More About Trauma-Informed Care